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  • Kate Woolsey

3 Lies Keeping You Stuck + 3 Steps to Shift them!

Here are 3 common lies I see keeping clients -- and myself! -- stuck from time to time. Plus, three steps to help shift back to reality + get unstuck.

Lie #1: You don't know.

The idea that you don't know what you want, what to do or where to begin is simply a myth your brain is telling you to keep you safely in the status quo.

Often, when we fall into the trap of thinking we don't know it is because there are too many external factors in the way.

These expectations create an internal blind spot. We are so afraid of disappointing someone we value or disrupting the lives we have, it becomes hard to see our own desires underneath.

And sometimes, when we see them, they feel too risky, too far away, too out of character to pursue.

THE TRUTH: The truth is, you possess lifetimes of inner knowing that have brought you to this precise moment in time. You hold the answers + know exactly where to begin, what to do + what you want. It may feel scary or cloudy -- you may even dislike the answer! -- but it is there.

Lie #2: You can't change directions now.

Sometimes, we know what we want, but we don't think it is possible or "smart" to pursue.

When we have invested so much, it can become too hard or overwhelming to consider something new. We don't want to leave the job, relationship, home, belief we have been with for so long.

We feel committed, perhaps even obligated, to stick with it. We tell ourselves it is too late or we're too old.

Or, we are unprepared for the feelings of loss or uncertainty that might occur if we change things now.

THE TRUTH: The truth is, what you want is a clue to what suits you -- even if it feels inconvenient.

If you are craving a shift, there is likely a valid reason for it.

You are right on time for everything in your life + you have everything within yourself to create your most desired life. And to handle all of the emotions + challenges that come with it.

Plus, you don't have to take on the whole thing at once; there may be other possibilities to consider that help you bridge the gap between where you're at now + what you truly want.

Lie #3: You'll never make it.

Ahhh, the all familiar comfort of telling ourselves we can't do it, we'll never make it, it's too far away. Nothing impedes our progress like buying into the comforts of pessimism. Especially, when it's so cleverly disguised as supporting facts.

It is hard to go forward when the light at the end of the tunnel seems SO. FAR. AWAY.

Or when it feels like the odds are stacked against us. Or when we have so many other priorities. Or so little time. Or not enough money. Or not the right background. Or expertise. Or support.

When there are plenty of reasons it won't work out, it is easy to believe them.

TRUTH: Challenges certainly complicate the situation + make it harder. And yet, they do not control the outcome. You do. Just because it might not work out, doesn't mean it won't. In these scenarios, it likely means there is another way to look at it.

The truth is this desire was placed in your heart for a reason. It belongs to you. Which also means the Universe will conspire to help it work out in your favor.

Another helpful truth to remember is that progress is made one step at a time. You may feel far away from your endpoint, but that is no reason not to begin. Allowing yourself to embrace the journey will illuminate a whole new world you are meant to see.


Step #1: Get Curious.

Start by examining what expectations are at play. Make a list + brainstorm everything that could possibly be blocking you from seeing what you truly want or creative ways to step into it.

Step #2: Get Quiet.

Place your feet on the floor, sit up straight and take a few deep breaths. Ask yourself, "What do I want?" Listen to the answer. Don't judge it, dismiss it or deny it. Just get curious about it and invite it in. If you have trouble hearing the answer, try the prompts below.

Step #3: Get Creative.

Journal or voice memo the answers until you find what resonates as true for you. Don't make it sound good, just let it flow.

  • If I had plenty of money, support, time, what would I want or do?

  • If it wouldn't hurt anyone's feelings or disrupt my life, what would I want or do?

  • If I knew it was guaranteed to work out, what would I want or do?

  • If it was safe to want what I want, where would I begin?

  • If I could take a small step into what I want, what would I do?

  • If I leapt all the way into my most desired life, how would I feel?

  • What is one small thing I can do to create that same feeling, in my life right now?

If this doesn't come easily to you, challenge yourself to free write for a set amount of time - like 6 minutes - or to list a minimum of ideas - like 16. Sometimes, when you stretch, the most important gems are uncovered.

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